::pack:: of fixations

life after tragedy. living while grieving. love and triplets.


An Empath I Am

I recently had another therapist whom I’ve known & waxed for nearly 15 years in my chair.  I filled her in on some of the things I’ve recently written on here.  I explained to her what happened to me on Thanksgiving & the weeks that followed.  “You’re an Empath”, she said.  I had no idea what an empath even was.  I told her I feel energies & she didn’t look at me like I was the least bit crazy.  Because it’s a real thing!

This discovery about myself has been very profound for me & it answers a lot of questions I’ve had about myself.  I don’t remember names or faces very well.  I remember people’s energies.  It explains why going to Costco for me is the most draining thing I can think of, (also Disneyland).  I don’t get anxiety in social situations, I get extremely overwhelmed.  When I worked at Fashion Place mall for the few short months I lasted there doing brows, I’d come home so drained of all my energy.  Whenever I go to that mall it tends to take everything out of me.  Certain people, just being around them drains me.  When I first became an esthetician giving people facials was what my draining nightmares were made of.  I knew without a doubt that “energy” was real in those first few months of my career & haven’t offered facials in well over a decade.

I’ve done a little bit of research about empaths & in it I’ve learned that a lot of the times people with the most pain can be drawn to us, like a magnet.  This explains all the mean-girling I’ve experienced & why at times I attract so many toxic people.  It’s very common for empathic children to be called “lazy” ha!  This explains why so many people open up to me wholeheartedly, something I really love.  I love helping people with their problems.  I love helping others love themselves.  I love when a person discovers their natural gifts.  I love my job you guys!  I love that I’m showing my kids that you can go to work (we call it going to twerk around here) & genuinely love what you do.  This explains why I enjoy being alone so much & even my love for writing.

Empaths are very intuitive.  Since my childhood was invalidating & confusing I’ve been ignoring my gut, which I’ve also described on here as floating.  I’m no longer floating.  I’m present.  I’m listening.  I’m embracing my own gifts, because I can!  

I know that a lot of people are like me.  I really relate to this article: 


Any one else here an empath?!?



  1. YES!! So much yes!! It's why I need to have my own office at work, I can't be in the cubicle mess, the energy just drains me. I work M-F 7-4 in my office I need Saturday and Sunday to be quiet, without people. If I have to go somewhere on Saturday AND Sunday of the weekend, I'm so drained (and grouchy) for the entire week following that. I do go to church every Sunday, which, doesn't drain me at all. It's a great church, some other churches drain me. It's so hard to describe to people who don't feel it and honestly, I was super confused most of my life about why people couldn't tell how other people were feeling or why I absolutely cannot do "fake" people. The energy that people give off when they are acting one way but feeling another is sooo weird to me. It's almost a physical feeling. It's probably also why I am unable to fake my emotions, which has gotten me into a lot of trouble in my lifetime. I feel like I'm going on and on and people will think I'm crazy, but it's so real.

  2. I totally get you!!! I’m wondering if I even have ADD at all now lol. I am so glad we are not crazy;). Thank you for commenting!

  3. My comment didn't publish before, but I wanted you to know that you are helping so many of us out here reading your blog :)

  4. Dear Empath, the One who feels everything so deeply,

    I understand that your tender heart feels so tired, so overwhelmed by the heaviness of life here. You don't understand how people can be so mean, so cruel, so vindictive and so angry. But even more so, you just don't understand why everyone expects YOU to also be that way.
    It's just not in your nature. You love. You see all of life with love, and you only want others to also see the love and beauty that is present in all of life.
    You've walked through most of your life feeling like an outsider, like you're from somewhere else, and you're beginning to desperately want to go Home there now. Please don't give up. You're not wrong. You're not the one who is wearing blinders to our true nature. You've known the answer is love all along...
    The time has come for you to flourish, to live from your heart and to share the immeasurable joys that doing so affords. It's your time to shine, dear One. And to do so, you simply have to love yourself...love yourself as fiercely as you've loved everyone else. That's been your job all along - and now it's your time. Love YOU with all your being, dear One, and you'll remember again that All is Well. Love Your Soul

    "Soul Speaking Quote"

    Once I read your post I started looking up everything I could about "Empath's." I too, am an empath. I found this quote and have read it over and over again. It has helped me as I have felt "down" some days. This may not apply to you 100 % but I thought of you when I read a few of the sentences.

  5. Wow! It’s so beautiful. I can relate to all of it. Thank you!!!❤️