::pack:: of fixations

life after tragedy. living while grieving. love and triplets.


debated question

Back in the day, before I had triplets somehow this same debate would pop up on I'd say a twice a year basis.  

The if you had twins would you dress them alike? question

I think it's fair to guess that mostly women talk about this.  

1)You always have your people who are so so passionate about why it just...disgusts them just...eww...just drives them crazy.

2)Then you have your I don't know-ers, or I just don't care enough to think about it-ers ---> this was my category.   

3)Then you have your absolutely's, your it's like my obsession, or your definite just yes-ers with no explanation-ers.

I totally forgot about this until a few days ago!  And I just want to put it out there that it's okay if you're in the first category, I get it.  But now that I have been a mother to triplets for a little over a year now, here's why I choose to.

It's for the same reason I try really hard to not wear pajama pants to the grocery store.  (leggings/yoga pants don't count as pajama pants fyi) I won't look put together, I will look messy.

To me it feels like they aren't matching when they aren't dressed identical.  When they are dressed the same they match!  It makes me feel like I have it together. Since there are 3 of them, and they all have brown hair when they are not matching it looks messy to me.  I realize most people won't even notice this.  But it just looks a little more nice and neat to me.  And the weirdest part is if you know me well you know I'm more of a non-matcher with everything else.

But when we are home, alone, where no one can see us... we don't match and I personally wear the foulest looking ensembles, the more comfortable the better.

Also, say you bring them to a BBQ where there are gonna be lots of people and amongst those people are salt of the earth saints who love to play with babies, or at least pretend to so a couple of exhausted parents can zone out or interact with the humans outside our house or work for minutes at a time.  Only to come up for air and do a quick headcount every now and then.  When they are matching that headcount goes so much faster.  There's much less work for your brain to remember who was wearing what and look for that color, all while trying to stay tuned into the conversation.  

P.S. I will neither confirm nor deny if I have ever worn pajama pants to the grocery store.  But if I have, the reason I would've stopped is because I would've ran into WAY too many people I know whilst wearing them.  I hear it's a hard habit to break if you're a gambler.

If you see us out and about and they are not matching it's cause we are very tired, and we don't care if we look messy.  Kinda like when one would maybe wear pajama pants to the grocery store.

A brave moment when I took every one to JoAnn Fabric all by myself.

My dollies turned 1 last month.
Finn loves his first sport!  He wears his hat even when he has his pajamas on.  He is such a good kid and I have to say is turning out to be quite funny.  I love hearing his view on things.  He sure can talk though wow!

My Dad pulling them out to the car for me.  Another brave day for me.  I drove to Utah County with  just the girls for my Niece's wedding reception all by myself.  Ry stayed home to take Finn to his first coach pitch game ever.  They are wearing different outfits which was a little hard on me but I tried to stay in the same color palette.

I've been trying here and there for the last couple of weeks to get a good picture of us when I'm wearing make-up & have decent clothes on.  Wow-wee was it difficult.  I sorta love this one though.  I'm kinda blurry, and it's not perfect but it's us being us.  I love this man.  He knows me.
He knows my OCDs, knows my crazies, knows my humor.  He does almost everything I say... almost.  He's one of the best people I've ever known and he's mine.  I always like to say that I know I got lucky with him because I'm not so lucky in a lot of other areas.

Happy 13th Anniversary in 5 days Ry!


  1. How absolutely precious! Happy almost anniversary! Y'all have been through it all and are stronger than ever! I love, love, love how you are living life and making the most of every day being a mama to your sweet babies. And Finn is ADORABLE playing baseball! How absolutely perfect.


  2. Happy Anniversary! Beautiful picture of you! Your girls are so adorable... and Finn is such a little stud (: I'd probably dress multiples alike if I had some...

  3. I totally get the dressing alike thing. I was in the same category as you, but now that I have identical boys - it totally looks more clean when they are dressed the same. I try and match Julie to them too, but it doesn't always work out :)
    Happy Anniversary!!!

  4. Happy anniversary....you two are adorable and you are beautiful. My mother dressed me and my two older sisters alike when we were little girls. Not sure why because we are all 2 years apart but I guess she felt the same....they are mine and I can dress them alike if I want. The girls will always be connected to each other but one day when they are older (probably not until 6 or 8), one will say, "I don't want to be dressed like those other two!!" I think it will be a funny moment and I'll bet one or all will independent like that. They are so precious and Finn...well, he's just the cutest thing ever. I love the photo of you and hubby. He must be one amazing person.

  5. They are so stinking cute! Happy anniversary, Friend!

  6. LOVE LOVE LOVE the matchy matchy!

  7. Such a beautiful life. Thank you for sharing.

  8. I try to coordinate my boys' clothes (everyone wears a green shirt and jeans or a navy shirt and khaki shorts, but no exactly matching) for the day because in my paranoid mind if one of them ever goes missing I can rattle off exactly what they are wearing - it's just easier to remember this way. Plus, I think it's pretty darn cute. I can't believe the girls are 1 and Finn is so big!

  9. Happy Anniversary!!! Thanks for the pics of you all and update :)
    I rarely dressed the girls alike but I would do what I called the 'Twin Game' when clothes shopping :) They would get the same outfit but in different colours. Helped my family and friends differenciate who was who. Did buy them the same coats, shoes, hats. Made life easier!